Grief
by McAwsome
Summary: Ahsoka tried to stop it, but Steela Gerrera's death was so sudden. Reaction fic for Tipping Points. Rated T for safety.
**A/N Hi everyone! This is my first fic, so please feel free to offer any advice or constructive criticism. Also, it wouldn't let me format this the way I wanted, whenever I save it resets it. Anyone know how to fix this?**

Ahsoka quickly rose to her feet, looking to her side to make sure Lux was alright. Hewasn't there. _Is he trapped under the gunship?_

"Hang on!" she heard him yell. Ahsoka spun around. Lux was there, laying on his stomach, straining to reach farther over the cliff. _Steela._ She ran toward the edge and watched as Lux slid closer, trying to get just a few more inches, then he too, slid over the cliff. Ahsoka skidded to a stop, desperately reaching out with the Force to catch him.

"I'll handled this." she said, sitting him down a safe distance away. She took his place at the edge of the cliff, looking down at Steela, who had managed to grab a rough patch of rock to stop herself from falling all the way over. She summoned the Force again, lifting Steela closer to her outstretched hands.

"I've got you." Ahsoka called out, her concentration on nothing but Steela.

 _Just a little farther. Just a few more feet._ She stared into the worried eyes of her friend - however short a time they had been friends - saw the beads of sweat on her forehead, felt the sweat running down her own face, her limbs shaking from the strain on both her mind and muscles.

 _Almost there._ Her eyes never left Steela's as they both strained to reach the other, they were so close.

 _Almost there_. Then a warning went out through the Force. There was pain, hot, burning, in her left shoulder. She saw Steela's face, shocked, terrified, as she fell backwards, disoriented. _What happened?_ She lay there staring at the sky as she gathered her senses. Then she remembered.

 _Steela!_ She got back to her feet and rushed to the edge of the cliff. _No. Steela_. At the rocky bottom of the cliff a cloud of dust cleared, revealing several rebels circled around a limp figure. Saw clutched the body - _Steela's body_ \- to his chest, mourning the loss of a great woman, a strong leader, his sister.

She could feel the shock in the Force, the sorrow, and disbelief radiating off of Saw, Lux, Dendub, and all the men and woman that witnessed Steela Gerrera's death. She tore her eyes from the seen below, looking up at Lux. He dropped his blaster, staring into the canyon below, eyes filled with unshed tears. He slowly turned to look at her, his eyes traveling to the wound in her shoulder, then the smoking canon on the gunship behind them, before going back to Steela's body.

He numbly leaned down, picked up his blaster, and started for the Ruping that sat perched farther back on the cliff, Ahsoka following a few steps behind. Neither spoke as they mounted the beast, flying into the canyon and landing outside the circle of people. Lux slid down, then carefully helped Ahsoka dismount.

They made they're way through the small crowd of people, to the small open area in the center were Saw sat, Steela layed in his lap.

"I shot that gunship down." He said, voice barely above a whisper. "It crashed into her position."

"She knew the risks." Lux said as he gently ran his hand down her cheek. "We all knew what it would take to free Onderon."

Ahsoka stood behind them, watching Saw and Lux, the way they looked at Steela's eerily calm face, both crying silent tears.

 _I should've tried harder._

Her mind flashed back to those last few moments of Steela's life. How her face held a determined expression as she clung to the side of the cliff, how it flooded with relief as she was lifted toward solid ground, then filled with fear as she fell to her death. And now it was peaceful, she wouldn't have to worry about the people of Onderon, or the Separatist. But she should. She should still be here, fighting for her people's freedom. Because that's who she was, a fighter.

 _I should've tried harder._

Because she hadn't tried hard enough. If she had then Steela would still be here, fighting, leading, like she was meant to.

Ahsoka gave no reaction as her wound was cleaned and bandaged, as the medic told her how close it had come  
to hitting her heart. She only vaguely realized that there were tears running down her face.  
She had lost men before, many times, had lost friends. But this was different. Steela wasn't a clone, created to die fighting for the republic. Wasn't a Jedi, taught to live her life solely for the good of others. She was a civilian. She had a family, friends. No one asked her to fight for her people, to lay down her life so others could live, she had stepped up for what she believed in and was killed protecting it.

 _Because I was too slow._

She knew this wasn't the Jedi way, to linger on what had already passed. What couldn't be changed. But how could she not?  
She watched Saw reluctantly move his sister's body from his lap. He gently laid her on her back, placing a soft kiss on her forehead as Lux laid a blanket over her cold, dead body.

 _It's my fault, I should've tried harder._ She slowly walked over to them, kneeling next to Saw.

"I am so, sorry." She said, voice cracking as she stared at at the cloth covering Steela's face.

"Me too." His voice was just as weak and defeated as her's.

 _I should've tried harder._

 **Thank you so much for reading, and happy (late) Star Wars day.**


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